Floofty Fizzlebean (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
vexedscientist) wrote2022-07-15 01:30 pm
vexedscientist) wrote2022-07-15 01:30 pm
Quotes
FLOOFTY'S BIG QUEST
Floofty: "Ah, you're here. I have need of your assistance again. Since my last discovery, I've been testing the limits of Bugsnax regeneration. Unfortunately I've done all I can with this one leg. I want to try something rather more advanced. Put simply: I'm going to remove my head."
Journalist: "Come again?"
Floofty: "Pardon me, I forgot your limitations. Remove, as in cut off. Head, as in the thinky part. And I am... reasonably certain that Bugsnax will regrow it in its entirety."
Journalist: "This seems unsafe."
Floofty: "Indeed. Perhaps I could do something more measured if I had a full team, funding, and a great deal more subjects. But as usual, nobody's volunteering."
Journalist: "I can find more volunteers."
Floofty: "Oh? Very well. You're welcome to try."
[Journalist asks around...]
Journalist: "No volunteers..."
Floofty: "As expected. My name alone is enough to frighten them off."
Journalist: "Does that bother you?"
Floofty: "Hardly. It's not me they're truly afraid of. They give in to cowardice and ignorance because they cannot fathom the tremendous good that my research can do. Since I have failed time and again to change their minds, the burden rests on me to complete the work. Perhaps then they will understand its value. As for you, I require enough Bugsnax to fully transform my body. Only the sweetest and most filling will be acceptable."
Journalist: "Why is that?"
Floofty: "Consider it a personal request. This could be my last meal, after all." [chuckles]
THE FIGHT
Snorpy: "You put a stop to this nonsense right now!"
Floofty: "Snorpington. Here to sabotage my career again?"
Snorpy: "Sabotage?! I'm trying to save your life!"
Floofty: "Nonsense. If my hypothesis is correct, I will be perfectly fine and I will have advanced medical knowledge by a century."
Snorpy: "And if you're wrong, you'll be headless! Even after everything you've done... I still care about you, Floofty."
Floofty: "Don't try to infect me with your cowardice! What you should 'care' about is my work! That is what is truly important!"
Snorpy: "You are important! Despite your rampaging ego, the world will go on with or without your experiments."
Floofty: "I would think you, at least, would understand. Instead you insist on being a selfish, spineless, slack-jawed baby!"
Snorpy: "See, this is why nobody wants to help you!"
AFTER THE FIGHT (end of Floofty's questline)
Floofty: "It's pitiful, isn't it?" [sigh] "I can rearrange fibrous tissue with electrostatic waves... but I cannot convince my own brother to help me. My work should stand for itself. I shouldn't need to put so much effort into explaining myself! But it does take effort. With the others it is simple. I can write them off as ignorant, frightened children." [sigh] "Ugh... But not Snorpy. I know he's not a coward or a fool, which means that the error is mine. I cannot make myself understood... so I lose patience... and I give up on understanding. And perhaps that... is cowardice on my part."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: WHAT HAPPENED
Floofty: "We were working together on a government-funded research project. Advanced prosthetics that are ten times stronger than an ordinary Grumpus. But our dear Snorpington discovered that the government had less than savory plans for that technology, and despite my protestations, he tried to make those plans public knowledge."
Chandlo: "Well yeah, I don't blame him! Even you gotta admit that's pretty jacked up, dawg."
Floofty: "Am I the world's only optimist? That technology would have saved lives! If it must either exist with some consequences or not exist at all, I think the choice is clear."
Shelda: "Easy to say when you aren't the one living with the consequences."
Floofty: "Gnaaa! Where did you come from?! Shoo!" [sigh] "Unfortunately, Snorpington agreed with you. He tried to play whistleblower, but before he could make a sound we were both fired. And after that... there was a campaign to slander both of us. To discredit any allegations he might still make."
Chandlo: "So... there really was a conspiracy against you two?!"
Floofty: [halfway between a 'hmph' and a laugh] "If you must call it that. But only the most boring sort, with 'paperwork' and 'lawsuits'."
Chandlo: "Still, that means it's not all in his head--"
Floofty: "Don't mistake justification for reason! Snorpington has moved well beyond the realities of our situation."
Chandlo: "...Alright, Floofty. Thanks for tellin' me all that."
Floofty: "Hmm, happy to have enlightened you. Honestly, I expected this conversation to involve more shouting and headlocks."
Chandlo: "Naw, not this time, we're cool! But hey, we should talk more often. And maybe I can show you how to headlock me!"
Floofty: "Perhaps. But for now, my work beckons."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: SHELDA'S QUEST
Floofty: "Ah, Shelda, you seem to be dangerously close to my personal space. If you're here to trap me in a spell circle again, I will inform you that I could leave at any time and I was merely acting."
Shelda: "Temper your contemptuous heart. One is here on a quest for understanding. To unlock the forbidden knowledge of Bugsnax."
Floofty: "Oh? And you've come to me? Why don't you ask your Mother Naturae? Or a crystal or whatever you talk to?"
Shelda: "The Path is... shrouded at the moment. One believes that clearing this impasse requires a more... scientific lens."
Floofty: "How interesting! Are you certain? I'm given to understand that I exude a foetid aura of utter evil from every pore."
Shelda: "You are reckless, and arrogant, and so, so rude... but one does not truly believe that you are evil."
Floofty: "Eheheh. Well, I have little time nor patience for your games. If you want to know something, stop speaking like a horoscope and ask."
Shelda: [SIGH] "Ugh. I... want to know the essence of Bugsnax. What is it they're made of? If I can understand that, then I might know whether they're actually separate from Mother Naturae, or born from the darkness of her history..."
Floofty: "I'm not about to resolve your philosophical quandaries. There is no answer to the 'why' of the universe. Bugsnax simply exist. However, since you've finally taken an interest in my studies, then just this once I will educate you. I can show you how to extract live Snakmatter for microscopic viewing without that matter denaturing." [patronizing] "Ah, but if I were to explain it to a very small infant, denaturing is--"
Shelda: "I know what denaturing means!"
Floofty: [stammers slightly in honest surprise] "You do?!"
Shelda: "I'm here to learn about Bugsnax, not vocabulary."
Floofty: "Aha. Very well, then, our lesson should proceed smoothly. Step one of seventeen: preparing an adequate formalin solution..."
Shelda: [to the Journalist] "Thank you for encouraging this old lady to learn something new. Now you better leave us to it, I sense this may take a while..."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: THEIR QUEST
Journalist: "How's the analysis going?"
Floofty: "Blast it all! I do not need your distractions. I've obtained dried particles of plant slurry, but I have no way to analyze them. It's like living in the stone age out here! Perhaps if I had a particle separator, an electron microscope, and a degree in botany... Mm, bah. Plants are not my area of expertise."
Journalist: "We do know an herbalist..."
Floofty: "You cannot be serious! I would sooner eat my bow tie than listen to a word of Shelda's 'advice'."
Journalist: "Alright, eat your bow tie. Right now."
Floofty: "That was clearly a statement of hyperbole! I very much like this bow tie and I will not eat it even if doing so wins an argument."
Journalist: "What if Shelda can help?"
Floofty: "Ha! If Shelda knows the secret of the Shrink Spice, I will eat my bow tie."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: THEIR QUEST (continued)
Shelda: "One senses the reek of a foul presence."
Floofty: "Cease your hostilities, Shelda. I am here on business. I've been informed that you may possess a rudimentary understanding of phytochemical reactions, which I am in need of."
Shelda: [gasp] "Strike the stars from the sky, the wicked one has come to me for guidance? But surely one's ancient ways are far too primitive compared to the miracles of modern science?"
Floofty: "I do not appreciate your sarcasm. If you do not wish to help me, then simply say so and begone with you."
Shelda: "One would never! It is one's Path to offer guidance to all who seek it, no matter how undeserving they may be."
Floofty: [grumble] "Very well. Then I require an analysis of the Shrink Spice. Tell me what is in it, and be quick about it. Please."
Shelda: "Mmm, ah yes... A poultice made in the herbological traditions of the Mother." [short chuckle] "Though its purpose I cannot condone. If that is what you desire, then one will enter the olfactory realm to find the answers you seek."
Floofty: "Waft, don't sniff."
Shelda: "I know that!" [inhales] "Ahhh... so many subtle aromas. Witch hazel... cinnamon... ah, black tea. Each a natural remedy for inflammation! And among these astringents..." [starts coughing suddenly] "Oof! Oil of vitriol."
Floofty: "Oil of vitriol?! That's sulfuric acid! A common but powerful desiccant... That certainly explains the burning sensation."
Shelda: [drops the mystic voice] "Floofty, did you tell the journalist to throw acid at you?"
Floofty: [hurriedly] "Well, this has been surprisingly not a waste of time, I am going to leave now. I may call on your services again."
Shelda: "...and you're welcome."
ENDING LINES (Bad End)
Floofty: [giving in] "I cannot let this opportunity pass!"
Floofty: [death lines] "I can feel it... The precipice! In Bugsnax, the potential to understand the very nature of being! I would be a fool not to indulge!"
ENDING LINES (Good End)
Floofty: "While I regret that all my research was destroyed, I have come away with a revelation: I cannot improve Grumpuskind if I refuse to understand it. It may be a long, and frankly annoying endeavor... but it is one worth pursuing."
ENDING LINES (Snorpy dead)
Floofty: "Snorpington is dead... It is a simple yet unfathomable fact. It is tempting now to unhinge myself from the concept of self-preservation, and pursue a pyrrhic victory over the parasites that shatter our fragile world. But if I allow myself this one small sentiment, I should instead take on some fraction of my brother's caution... and conscience. After all, ha, somebody needs to look after Chandlo."
ENDING LINES (Shelda dead)
Floofty: "I cannot believe that... Shelda was right. That thought reverberates throughout my skull on loop. I was too petty to see it, and now she's paid the price for my hubris. For all our enmity, she was never afraid to challenge my preconceived notions. And above all else, she believed in sharing her knowledge. After all, nothing known is useful if it is known alone. If I am to learn one lesson from Shelda, let that be it."
Floofty: "Ah, you're here. I have need of your assistance again. Since my last discovery, I've been testing the limits of Bugsnax regeneration. Unfortunately I've done all I can with this one leg. I want to try something rather more advanced. Put simply: I'm going to remove my head."
Journalist: "Come again?"
Floofty: "Pardon me, I forgot your limitations. Remove, as in cut off. Head, as in the thinky part. And I am... reasonably certain that Bugsnax will regrow it in its entirety."
Journalist: "This seems unsafe."
Floofty: "Indeed. Perhaps I could do something more measured if I had a full team, funding, and a great deal more subjects. But as usual, nobody's volunteering."
Journalist: "I can find more volunteers."
Floofty: "Oh? Very well. You're welcome to try."
[Journalist asks around...]
Journalist: "No volunteers..."
Floofty: "As expected. My name alone is enough to frighten them off."
Journalist: "Does that bother you?"
Floofty: "Hardly. It's not me they're truly afraid of. They give in to cowardice and ignorance because they cannot fathom the tremendous good that my research can do. Since I have failed time and again to change their minds, the burden rests on me to complete the work. Perhaps then they will understand its value. As for you, I require enough Bugsnax to fully transform my body. Only the sweetest and most filling will be acceptable."
Journalist: "Why is that?"
Floofty: "Consider it a personal request. This could be my last meal, after all." [chuckles]
THE FIGHT
Snorpy: "You put a stop to this nonsense right now!"
Floofty: "Snorpington. Here to sabotage my career again?"
Snorpy: "Sabotage?! I'm trying to save your life!"
Floofty: "Nonsense. If my hypothesis is correct, I will be perfectly fine and I will have advanced medical knowledge by a century."
Snorpy: "And if you're wrong, you'll be headless! Even after everything you've done... I still care about you, Floofty."
Floofty: "Don't try to infect me with your cowardice! What you should 'care' about is my work! That is what is truly important!"
Snorpy: "You are important! Despite your rampaging ego, the world will go on with or without your experiments."
Floofty: "I would think you, at least, would understand. Instead you insist on being a selfish, spineless, slack-jawed baby!"
Snorpy: "See, this is why nobody wants to help you!"
AFTER THE FIGHT (end of Floofty's questline)
Floofty: "It's pitiful, isn't it?" [sigh] "I can rearrange fibrous tissue with electrostatic waves... but I cannot convince my own brother to help me. My work should stand for itself. I shouldn't need to put so much effort into explaining myself! But it does take effort. With the others it is simple. I can write them off as ignorant, frightened children." [sigh] "Ugh... But not Snorpy. I know he's not a coward or a fool, which means that the error is mine. I cannot make myself understood... so I lose patience... and I give up on understanding. And perhaps that... is cowardice on my part."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: WHAT HAPPENED
Floofty: "We were working together on a government-funded research project. Advanced prosthetics that are ten times stronger than an ordinary Grumpus. But our dear Snorpington discovered that the government had less than savory plans for that technology, and despite my protestations, he tried to make those plans public knowledge."
Chandlo: "Well yeah, I don't blame him! Even you gotta admit that's pretty jacked up, dawg."
Floofty: "Am I the world's only optimist? That technology would have saved lives! If it must either exist with some consequences or not exist at all, I think the choice is clear."
Shelda: "Easy to say when you aren't the one living with the consequences."
Floofty: "Gnaaa! Where did you come from?! Shoo!" [sigh] "Unfortunately, Snorpington agreed with you. He tried to play whistleblower, but before he could make a sound we were both fired. And after that... there was a campaign to slander both of us. To discredit any allegations he might still make."
Chandlo: "So... there really was a conspiracy against you two?!"
Floofty: [halfway between a 'hmph' and a laugh] "If you must call it that. But only the most boring sort, with 'paperwork' and 'lawsuits'."
Chandlo: "Still, that means it's not all in his head--"
Floofty: "Don't mistake justification for reason! Snorpington has moved well beyond the realities of our situation."
Chandlo: "...Alright, Floofty. Thanks for tellin' me all that."
Floofty: "Hmm, happy to have enlightened you. Honestly, I expected this conversation to involve more shouting and headlocks."
Chandlo: "Naw, not this time, we're cool! But hey, we should talk more often. And maybe I can show you how to headlock me!"
Floofty: "Perhaps. But for now, my work beckons."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: SHELDA'S QUEST
Floofty: "Ah, Shelda, you seem to be dangerously close to my personal space. If you're here to trap me in a spell circle again, I will inform you that I could leave at any time and I was merely acting."
Shelda: "Temper your contemptuous heart. One is here on a quest for understanding. To unlock the forbidden knowledge of Bugsnax."
Floofty: "Oh? And you've come to me? Why don't you ask your Mother Naturae? Or a crystal or whatever you talk to?"
Shelda: "The Path is... shrouded at the moment. One believes that clearing this impasse requires a more... scientific lens."
Floofty: "How interesting! Are you certain? I'm given to understand that I exude a foetid aura of utter evil from every pore."
Shelda: "You are reckless, and arrogant, and so, so rude... but one does not truly believe that you are evil."
Floofty: "Eheheh. Well, I have little time nor patience for your games. If you want to know something, stop speaking like a horoscope and ask."
Shelda: [SIGH] "Ugh. I... want to know the essence of Bugsnax. What is it they're made of? If I can understand that, then I might know whether they're actually separate from Mother Naturae, or born from the darkness of her history..."
Floofty: "I'm not about to resolve your philosophical quandaries. There is no answer to the 'why' of the universe. Bugsnax simply exist. However, since you've finally taken an interest in my studies, then just this once I will educate you. I can show you how to extract live Snakmatter for microscopic viewing without that matter denaturing." [patronizing] "Ah, but if I were to explain it to a very small infant, denaturing is--"
Shelda: "I know what denaturing means!"
Floofty: [stammers slightly in honest surprise] "You do?!"
Shelda: "I'm here to learn about Bugsnax, not vocabulary."
Floofty: "Aha. Very well, then, our lesson should proceed smoothly. Step one of seventeen: preparing an adequate formalin solution..."
Shelda: [to the Journalist] "Thank you for encouraging this old lady to learn something new. Now you better leave us to it, I sense this may take a while..."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: THEIR QUEST
Journalist: "How's the analysis going?"
Floofty: "Blast it all! I do not need your distractions. I've obtained dried particles of plant slurry, but I have no way to analyze them. It's like living in the stone age out here! Perhaps if I had a particle separator, an electron microscope, and a degree in botany... Mm, bah. Plants are not my area of expertise."
Journalist: "We do know an herbalist..."
Floofty: "You cannot be serious! I would sooner eat my bow tie than listen to a word of Shelda's 'advice'."
Journalist: "Alright, eat your bow tie. Right now."
Floofty: "That was clearly a statement of hyperbole! I very much like this bow tie and I will not eat it even if doing so wins an argument."
Journalist: "What if Shelda can help?"
Floofty: "Ha! If Shelda knows the secret of the Shrink Spice, I will eat my bow tie."
ISLE OF BIGSNAX: THEIR QUEST (continued)
Shelda: "One senses the reek of a foul presence."
Floofty: "Cease your hostilities, Shelda. I am here on business. I've been informed that you may possess a rudimentary understanding of phytochemical reactions, which I am in need of."
Shelda: [gasp] "Strike the stars from the sky, the wicked one has come to me for guidance? But surely one's ancient ways are far too primitive compared to the miracles of modern science?"
Floofty: "I do not appreciate your sarcasm. If you do not wish to help me, then simply say so and begone with you."
Shelda: "One would never! It is one's Path to offer guidance to all who seek it, no matter how undeserving they may be."
Floofty: [grumble] "Very well. Then I require an analysis of the Shrink Spice. Tell me what is in it, and be quick about it. Please."
Shelda: "Mmm, ah yes... A poultice made in the herbological traditions of the Mother." [short chuckle] "Though its purpose I cannot condone. If that is what you desire, then one will enter the olfactory realm to find the answers you seek."
Floofty: "Waft, don't sniff."
Shelda: "I know that!" [inhales] "Ahhh... so many subtle aromas. Witch hazel... cinnamon... ah, black tea. Each a natural remedy for inflammation! And among these astringents..." [starts coughing suddenly] "Oof! Oil of vitriol."
Floofty: "Oil of vitriol?! That's sulfuric acid! A common but powerful desiccant... That certainly explains the burning sensation."
Shelda: [drops the mystic voice] "Floofty, did you tell the journalist to throw acid at you?"
Floofty: [hurriedly] "Well, this has been surprisingly not a waste of time, I am going to leave now. I may call on your services again."
Shelda: "...and you're welcome."
ENDING LINES (Bad End)
Floofty: [giving in] "I cannot let this opportunity pass!"
Floofty: [death lines] "I can feel it... The precipice! In Bugsnax, the potential to understand the very nature of being! I would be a fool not to indulge!"
ENDING LINES (Good End)
Floofty: "While I regret that all my research was destroyed, I have come away with a revelation: I cannot improve Grumpuskind if I refuse to understand it. It may be a long, and frankly annoying endeavor... but it is one worth pursuing."
ENDING LINES (Snorpy dead)
Floofty: "Snorpington is dead... It is a simple yet unfathomable fact. It is tempting now to unhinge myself from the concept of self-preservation, and pursue a pyrrhic victory over the parasites that shatter our fragile world. But if I allow myself this one small sentiment, I should instead take on some fraction of my brother's caution... and conscience. After all, ha, somebody needs to look after Chandlo."
ENDING LINES (Shelda dead)
Floofty: "I cannot believe that... Shelda was right. That thought reverberates throughout my skull on loop. I was too petty to see it, and now she's paid the price for my hubris. For all our enmity, she was never afraid to challenge my preconceived notions. And above all else, she believed in sharing her knowledge. After all, nothing known is useful if it is known alone. If I am to learn one lesson from Shelda, let that be it."